#69 - Balancing Intuition and Energy: Meditation, Leadership, and Finding Strength in Simplicity with Kimberly Cain
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Episode Summary:
In this episode of Sport Is Life, host Ian Hawkins sits down with Kimberly Cain—author, coach, and media professional—to explore the power of meditation, intuition, and energy awareness. Kimberly shares how simplicity and self-trust can unlock leadership potential, enhance athletic performance, and bring greater clarity to everyday life. Whether you're an athlete, a leader, or someone looking for deeper self-connection, this conversation is filled with insights to help you find strength in stillness.
What You’ll Learn in This Episode:
- How meditation can improve decision-making in sports and leadership
- The role of intuition in high-performance environments
- Practical tips for tuning into energy and awareness
- Why simplicity is key to personal growth and resilience
- Kimberly’s journey and how she helps others step into their full potential
About the Guest:
Kimberly Cain is an award winning songwriter/performing artist, author, producer, & human potential catalyst.
A Certified High Performance Coach® & Remo Drums HealthRHYTHMS® facilitator, she is passionate about inspiring people into freedom from self-imposed boundaries.
Kimberly has opened concerts for artists such as David Bowie & Sarah McLachlan, had her music featured on Dateline NBC, been a rock radio host on KZEW-FM (Dallas, TX) & produced entertainment for Dallas Cowboys. She has been on production teams for Oprah & has been the voice for hundreds of campaigns, including Southwest Airlines, Amtrak, Sheraton, & Coca-Cola. Kimberly is the author of a novel, Heaven, which is currently in pre-production as a TV series. She is also a competitive slalom course water skier.
Kimberly’s guidance has shifted many individuals & diverse audiences into the awareness of their power to live in excellence, joy, & freedom. She specializes in coaching leaders into their heart-centered personal power, so they can act with courage & enjoy greater vitality.
Kimberly’s podcast, The Naked Vibes Show, inspires listeners to embrace greater levels of energy, creativity, intuition & aliveness.
Link/s:
https://go.kimberlycain.com/
About the Host:
Ian Hawkins, host of "Sport Is Life," is dedicated to showing how sports can transform lives. With extensive experience as an athlete, a coach, PE teacher, community volunteer, and manager at Fox Sports, Ian brings a wealth of knowledge to the podcast. His journey began in his backyard, mentored by his older brother, and has since evolved into coaching elite athletes and business leaders. Ian's commitment to sports and personal development is evident in his roles as a performance coach and active community member. Through "Sport Is Life," Ian shares inspiring stories and valuable lessons to help listeners apply sports principles to all areas of life.
To access Ian's Performance Meditation Training, click here https://www.ianhawkinscoaching.com/performancemeditation and make sure you use the coupon "PODCAST" when you check out to get it for only $11.
Check Me Out On:
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ianhawkinscoaching
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ianhawkinscoaching
YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SportIsLife-IanHawkins
Theme Music Artist:
One Day Kings https://www.instagram.com/onedaykings/
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Transcript
guys listening to this, I'm going to tell
Speaker:you there is nothing better than you can
Speaker:do for your daughter, for your wife,
Speaker:for the women in your life. Than to
Speaker:love them and bring your masculine
Speaker:energy in a loving
Speaker:way and forget
Speaker:about all of those things where you can't
Speaker:show emotions. Show it, let it out, show
Speaker:your love because it it means everything
Speaker:and will make all the difference in the
Speaker:way that that girl
Speaker:becomes a woman and relates to men.
Speaker:It will make all the difference in her
Speaker:life. Absolutely.
Speaker:Today's guest on the Sport Is Life
Speaker:podcast is Kimberly Cain. She's worked
Speaker:with some of the biggest names in TV,
Speaker:in music. She's an author.
Speaker:But the part I was drawn most to is the
Speaker:work that she's done coaching men on
Speaker:their personal lives while participating
Speaker:in sport. Really powerful stuff. There's
Speaker:a heap of really good information on
Speaker:meditation, especially if you're just
Speaker:getting started and I want you to pay.
Speaker:Special attention to using
Speaker:intuition. In sports
Speaker:specifically, but in everyday life as
Speaker:well.
Speaker:I'm Ian Hawkins and this is Sport Is
Speaker:life. The purpose of sport, as I
Speaker:see it, is to see your vision become a
Speaker:reality, find your voice, create
Speaker:strong connections and learn to trust
Speaker:your body.
Speaker:Hi, Kimberly. How are you doing? Great.
Speaker:Happy to be here. Yeah, great to be here.
Speaker:We've just had a good old laugh before.
Speaker:We've jumped on so many similarities to
Speaker:our story, The intuitive side, the.
Speaker:You said you're a lifelong athlete. I can
Speaker:relate to that. You're into music,
Speaker:although I can't claim to be an artist
Speaker:like yourself and worked in television.
Speaker:So many, so many synchronicities here
Speaker:already. I want to start by talking about
Speaker:because we are going to dive into sport,
Speaker:but one of the real.
Speaker:Misunderstood areas of sport, I believe,
Speaker:is this intuitive side of us. So tell me
Speaker:when when you say you, you are intuitive,
Speaker:explain that to the listeners and
Speaker:viewers, what that means to you and how
Speaker:they in a way they can understand. Yeah,
Speaker:You know, we're all intuitive and we're
Speaker:all psychic, if you will. But the
Speaker:reason I like to use the term
Speaker:intuitive is because.
Speaker:There's there's sometimes a negative
Speaker:connotation that goes along with psychics
Speaker:people. You know, the, the
Speaker:whole, you know, old movies where it's
Speaker:like look into my crystal ball kind of
Speaker:thing, you know, and nobody needs that.
Speaker:They really don't and.
Speaker:Intuition is really at work on a higher
Speaker:level, so when I say we're all psychic,
Speaker:especially children, so there are
Speaker:not those barriers that
Speaker:prevent us from connecting to higher
Speaker:level energies. Like just an easy
Speaker:example would be connecting to an animal.
Speaker:If you're a person who has ever had an
Speaker:animal, you know, you're like, is that a
Speaker:person in that animal suit
Speaker:right there? No,
Speaker:exactly. It's like he seemed to know
Speaker:exactly what I was thinking right there.
Speaker:Because there's a higher level of
Speaker:communication that goes beyond words.
Speaker:And we pick it up in so many different
Speaker:ways. But most people
Speaker:have that sense very blocked.
Speaker:They see the five.
Speaker:Smell, taste, hearing
Speaker:sight as what is real. If it's right in
Speaker:front of me, it's real.
Speaker:And that's not necessarily the
Speaker:truth. Because our perceptions a lot of
Speaker:times lead us to see or hear things that
Speaker:may actually be a little bit different
Speaker:than what's being presented, let's say by
Speaker:the other person. But as we
Speaker:build our intuitive muscles.
Speaker:We can come to a greater understanding of
Speaker:how to communicate well with others, for
Speaker:instance, what they may be saying.
Speaker:May not be exactly what they're feeling
Speaker:and they may not know how to say that,
Speaker:but as we build our intuitive skills, we
Speaker:can perceive better what's being said
Speaker:there and handle our emotions better. So
Speaker:you know, it's so deep, but that's just a
Speaker:little touch in love it.
Speaker:And I think the thing that you mentioned
Speaker:there at the end is the is the most
Speaker:powerful part that people can take away
Speaker:from from what I've seen and experienced
Speaker:is is when everyone's got that
Speaker:intuitive ability but. How often do they
Speaker:not trust it? How often do they, they,
Speaker:you said they, they see beyond what was
Speaker:actually said and they, and they get a
Speaker:sense of things or, you know, I had that
Speaker:gut feeling that I should have done this
Speaker:or I shouldn't have done that, but I
Speaker:didn't listen and then I regretted it.
Speaker:And it's, and it's that ability to really
Speaker:trust, which is a key part, right? It
Speaker:really is. And then and then coming to
Speaker:an understanding also, because it can
Speaker:also become very fascinating to people
Speaker:where they kind of dive. The Cliff a
Speaker:little too far and everything is
Speaker:about psychism and intuition. And
Speaker:they're not balancing that with practical
Speaker:boots on the ground. You know, the way to
Speaker:walk in the world on a daily basis.
Speaker:And you know, like in Sedona, AZ, which
Speaker:is an amazing place to pick up energy
Speaker:and you can really feel it there. And
Speaker:you know, if, if somebody wants to Google
Speaker:it, if they don't know about it, you can
Speaker:Google like vortexes in Sedona, you can
Speaker:really feel. The changes in
Speaker:energy in different areas. And
Speaker:so there is a real thing there about
Speaker:you'll hear helicopters and somebody will
Speaker:go, well, somebody walked off the side of
Speaker:a mountain because they're just so
Speaker:blissed out that they're not paying
Speaker:attention to what is right there in
Speaker:front of them. So it's really about
Speaker:balancing both and understanding how to
Speaker:do that. Yeah, I love
Speaker:that. Now, one of the things that I
Speaker:really wanted to talk to you about today
Speaker:is how you are using sport in your
Speaker:coaching. To help people create shifts.
Speaker:Now, before we get into that, I want to
Speaker:ask you as the link to sport is
Speaker:that I see it all the time, these
Speaker:intuitive sports people and they
Speaker:talk about it. They go, you know, I just
Speaker:kind of do it. I don't really know what
Speaker:I'm doing. I just do it. I don't have a
Speaker:context for it. Is that
Speaker:something that you can explain to people?
Speaker:How they can because you've you've
Speaker:referenced it a couple of times where you
Speaker:say they can't see what's right in front
Speaker:of them. So how would someone in that
Speaker:moment?When I have that intuitive
Speaker:ability, whether it's the spotty gap,
Speaker:whether it's they need to throw a certain
Speaker:pass or or whatever it is
Speaker:like how do they be
Speaker:conscious and aware of that enough
Speaker:to be able to have a bit of
Speaker:control over that intuition. I
Speaker:love it. I mean, I love this subject so
Speaker:much so.
Speaker:You know, and, and there's so many places
Speaker:that I could go with this, but let me
Speaker:just. Start by saying.
Speaker:Any high level activity? OK, so
Speaker:I'm an athlete, but I've also been a
Speaker:performer, a performing musician for a
Speaker:lifetime and the same thing
Speaker:happens. And as a speaker, a public
Speaker:speaker, the same thing happens in
Speaker:all of those arenas. That's why I say
Speaker:it's not relegated to one
Speaker:activity. It's more about
Speaker:entering what?In music
Speaker:and in sports, what we call being in the
Speaker:zone and as an artist, you know,
Speaker:artists can talk about the muse or
Speaker:anytime that you enter into
Speaker:that zone or it's an
Speaker:elevated brain state, it's a
Speaker:change in brain wave patterns.
Speaker:So at an elevated
Speaker:state we have access to.
Speaker:Universal consciousness to
Speaker:information that is not stored
Speaker:or. Has not been previously
Speaker:learned by us because
Speaker:let's face it, I mean, there's so much
Speaker:more that we don't know than what we do
Speaker:know for each one of us. So
Speaker:sometimes you run into a thing, you go, I
Speaker:don't know how I knew that. How did I
Speaker:know that? Because it's in
Speaker:the universal consciousness and we're all
Speaker:connected like a web, an energetic web.
Speaker:So when you allow yourself
Speaker:to relax. And let go.
Speaker:And not be fearful. You can
Speaker:feel the fear, but it's about feel fear
Speaker:and do it anyway, Push through it because
Speaker:that is not a real thing
Speaker:most of the time. Sometimes it
Speaker:is, but 95% of the
Speaker:time what we're afraid of is not a real
Speaker:thing. It's a mental construct, OK.
Speaker:So when we can recognise that and say
Speaker:OK, OK, there's probably everything I'm
Speaker:conjuring up here is not even going to
Speaker:happen. It's not even a reality. Let me
Speaker:just push through it and I'm going
Speaker:to use an example of
Speaker:my sport. So I am a slalom
Speaker:course water skier. So I
Speaker:ski an obstacle course, which is.
Speaker:You know, it's a crazy high
Speaker:speed elite sport. So
Speaker:yeah, it's just the GS are awesome. So
Speaker:the deal is if you're in your thinking
Speaker:mind, you can really get hurt when
Speaker:you're doing that. So let's say I'm
Speaker:in the water and I'm ready for the boat
Speaker:to pull me up. If I am thinking
Speaker:about Oh my gosh, did I lock the front
Speaker:door before I left or oh am I prepared
Speaker:for that meeting tomorrow? Guess what? I
Speaker:need to stop right there
Speaker:because that's a signal that I
Speaker:am not in alignment and not
Speaker:present with what I'm doing. And I
Speaker:could get seriously injured that way,
Speaker:so. I allow myself to
Speaker:clear all of that mental
Speaker:chatter and
Speaker:1st go into a zone
Speaker:and into a space. It's like a meditative
Speaker:state where I feel the
Speaker:water around me. And you can use this
Speaker:with anything. If you're a rock climber,
Speaker:then you're feeling the rocks in the
Speaker:mountain, or if you're a football player,
Speaker:then you're connecting with the ball and
Speaker:the people around you. You can use it in
Speaker:any way, but for me, I'm
Speaker:connecting with the water. I'm feeling
Speaker:the water on my skin and at some
Speaker:point I in the water
Speaker:are the same thing. There ceases to be a
Speaker:boundary that's there. And
Speaker:so I speak to the water and I
Speaker:speak to my ski, to the
Speaker:boat, to the driver, to the rope.
Speaker:Every single thing is connected
Speaker:in an alignment and when we are working
Speaker:together. There's this harmonious
Speaker:activity that happens there, so. As I
Speaker:come up out of the water, then I
Speaker:look at the obstacle course in front of
Speaker:Maine. And what I see instead of
Speaker:seeing the obstacles, OK,
Speaker:because I'm going to flow around them
Speaker:like this instead of seeing the
Speaker:obstacles. And let me just say right
Speaker:here, anybody can relate to this. If you
Speaker:drive a car, bicycle, anything, if you
Speaker:look at the obstacle, you are going to
Speaker:drive right into it. So instead of
Speaker:skiing, instead of seeing the obstacle,
Speaker:OK, which is like this right in front of
Speaker:me, I look at the spaces
Speaker:between. So that I am moving
Speaker:into the spaces. And that
Speaker:is like all of life, every
Speaker:obstacle that you see before you
Speaker:bird's eye view, see the spaces
Speaker:and problems can just disappear
Speaker:right there in an instant. It's really,
Speaker:it's an amazing state to be in. And it's
Speaker:also science because guess what, you're
Speaker:endorphins, serotonin, all the feel
Speaker:good chemicals and hormones are lighten
Speaker:up. So your brain is in this heightened
Speaker:state and when?I love
Speaker:that. There's so many things I want to
Speaker:unpack from that. It made me think of one
Speaker:of my really well was my best mate
Speaker:growing up. We play cricket here. I don't
Speaker:know how familiar you are with cricket,
Speaker:but he was. He was.
Speaker:An elite batsman and he talked
Speaker:about like, you know, he said. I don't
Speaker:know why people look around at the
Speaker:fielders. I look at the gaps
Speaker:and I'm like, oh man, that is so
Speaker:simple. But. That's what
Speaker:most most people walk through life,
Speaker:looking at the problems, the obstacles,
Speaker:instead of trying to find the gaps and
Speaker:how you describe that that will work,
Speaker:whether it's sport, whether it's
Speaker:their their work family, it's like,
Speaker:let let's look for the the
Speaker:good stuff. Let's look for the next
Speaker:opportunity. That's powerful. Have you
Speaker:seen Steve Cutler's book, the Rise of
Speaker:Superman?Yes, and I have narrow
Speaker:concrete sitting on my table right now.
Speaker:Yeah, it's latest 1, I believe. Yeah,
Speaker:amazing. He's got some amazing stuff. But
Speaker:what you described, there was a lot of
Speaker:what he talked about the
Speaker:the increase in human performance in all
Speaker:fields is like a really steady rise. But
Speaker:in extreme sports, it's an exponential
Speaker:curve. And he described it similar to
Speaker:what you were saying. I just got the cat
Speaker:here saying hello. He
Speaker:described it as they become one
Speaker:with all of their surroundings and one of
Speaker:the examples. You would have remembered
Speaker:from the book when he talked about the
Speaker:guys in the wingsuit that had to fly in
Speaker:formation through this
Speaker:gap between buildings or whatever. And
Speaker:and like being completely present and
Speaker:having that full the detail
Speaker:around what they need to do so that in
Speaker:the moment they could just be in the
Speaker:moment. Like fascinating
Speaker:if you take time to go into your thinking
Speaker:mind. Boom, crash, it's
Speaker:over. You can't dip down into the
Speaker:thing because they're literally the.
Speaker:In the world of time,
Speaker:which we rise above when we get into that
Speaker:zone in the world of time, the amount of
Speaker:time that it literally takes to think and
Speaker:for the thoughts, the synapses to the
Speaker:thought to move across synapses in the
Speaker:brain, that time,
Speaker:then uh oh, you're already too late. But
Speaker:when you move into this zone, I, I saw
Speaker:this incredible. Going
Speaker:back to the intuitive piece and you can
Speaker:see it once you tune your own
Speaker:intuition. You can see it happening with
Speaker:other people. And, and I
Speaker:if I'd known we were going to go here,
Speaker:I would have looked it up beforehand
Speaker:because it's a great example. So I can't
Speaker:remember the player, but this was a
Speaker:University of Texas football game, which
Speaker:is my alma mater. Hook em Horns. And so
Speaker:I'm watching the game and I'm watching it
Speaker:on TV and they're way
Speaker:behind. OK. It's like, and, and we're
Speaker:we're down to that Hail Mary, you know,
Speaker:we're down to like the millisecond before
Speaker:the clock runs out. And they're
Speaker:lining up and most people would be
Speaker:like, this game's over. And you see
Speaker:people getting up, they walk away from
Speaker:the game, It's over, it's done. I'm
Speaker:looking at it. I see
Speaker:as the camera zooms in the just the
Speaker:slightest, most subtle change on the
Speaker:quarterback's face, barely
Speaker:perceptible. But I saw it and it went, he
Speaker:just entered the zone. They're going to
Speaker:win this game. You just watch what
Speaker:happens right here. And. Boom.
Speaker:That ball snapped.
Speaker:Bam. Done over they
Speaker:win the game and I saw it
Speaker:happening just prior to it
Speaker:happening in the world of time, right And
Speaker:it's so exciting when that happens so you
Speaker:can you can witness
Speaker:it absolutely goosebumps all
Speaker:through that and anyone who's played any
Speaker:sport has had a moment where they've
Speaker:experienced it where.
Speaker:Yeah, it it, it blocks
Speaker:off all of those thinking processes. And
Speaker:it's happening automatically. And I love
Speaker:the like, it's hard to describe, but it's
Speaker:like it's happening in slow motion, but
Speaker:it's also happening in an instant in your
Speaker:brain. It's just happening slow motion.
Speaker:You, you know what you're going to do.
Speaker:You don't have to think about it. You
Speaker:just know you're going to do it. You
Speaker:already know what the final results going
Speaker:to be. There are those magic moments. Do
Speaker:you have Because Steve
Speaker:Kotler talks about the four stages of
Speaker:flow and he talks about a whole of
Speaker:different ways that you can find it. From
Speaker:my experience, there are a number of
Speaker:ways. Do you have like a clear sort of
Speaker:process that you would help people
Speaker:identify how they would find that flow
Speaker:easier, whether it be sport or in other
Speaker:parts of their life? Yeah. You know,
Speaker:there, there are so many ways really.
Speaker:And it's very it's
Speaker:very individual. And let's
Speaker:say if I'm working with, if I'm coaching
Speaker:an individual or a small group.
Speaker:Then I can really hone in
Speaker:on what is going to
Speaker:get. That or those
Speaker:individuals to that state,
Speaker:but just in general
Speaker:terms, what I can say is
Speaker:that probably the number
Speaker:one method is going to be through
Speaker:meditation and
Speaker:meditation is something that so many
Speaker:people. Shy away from
Speaker:because I've tried. I don't know how to
Speaker:do it. I can't clear my mind. I sit
Speaker:down and I start to meditate. I'm like,
Speaker:that's home state. And then all these
Speaker:thoughts come creeping in. Yeah. So what
Speaker:they're not understanding is that that's
Speaker:normal. It is not
Speaker:meditation is not about
Speaker:clearing all thoughts, because it is
Speaker:not going to happen.
Speaker:What that is putting yourself in a
Speaker:state and and saying, I'm going to
Speaker:set aside this time to
Speaker:train myself and to enter
Speaker:into a place of
Speaker:peace. It's really self care is what it
Speaker:is and and care for
Speaker:our loved ones for those around us
Speaker:because. Meditation has been
Speaker:shown to have exponential effects over
Speaker:time. So let's say you start
Speaker:and you've got all these thoughts
Speaker:creeping in and you really only get
Speaker:30 seconds Max of
Speaker:a peaceful mind
Speaker:where you're picturing yourself walking
Speaker:through a beautiful field and there's a
Speaker:nice beautiful flowing
Speaker:breeze and all is right with the
Speaker:world. You get 30 seconds. You know
Speaker:what? Congratulations.
Speaker:Because next time you may get
Speaker:45 seconds and then a minute. And before
Speaker:you know it, you got 15 minutes. And that
Speaker:15 minutes may be broken up into
Speaker:segments with thoughts. You're in that
Speaker:beautiful field and you're experiencing
Speaker:and oh, wait a minute, what is this?
Speaker:There's my kid is suddenly running
Speaker:through my scene and going, I need help.
Speaker:OK, All right, great. I see you. Love
Speaker:you. But right now I'm in the field, so
Speaker:you just keep. Letting it staying in the
Speaker:flow and bringing yourself what I call
Speaker:back to centre all right so that's
Speaker:the number one way I
Speaker:actually created
Speaker:some movement meditations is what I call
Speaker:them because it can be very
Speaker:difficult for some people to even quiet
Speaker:the mind even for a few minutes. They
Speaker:actually each of our brains, you know
Speaker:operates differently same type of brain,
Speaker:but we. Different things turn
Speaker:on different areas of our
Speaker:brains. So some people for
Speaker:this would this would go to why I love
Speaker:speed in my sport of skiing, because when
Speaker:I'm in that zone of speed
Speaker:where a lot of people
Speaker:that sense of speed may make them feel
Speaker:totally out of control for me, then it
Speaker:puts me into that zone and everything, as
Speaker:you said, goes into slow motion around
Speaker:me. So I thought, OK, what about
Speaker:for people like that who have trouble
Speaker:meditating? I created some.
Speaker:Meditations where I have rhythm
Speaker:patterns that start very,
Speaker:very slow, so that instead of
Speaker:trying to clear your mind, you're
Speaker:actually focusing on the rhythm pattern
Speaker:itself, and it's very slow. There's some
Speaker:that are faster, people love to start
Speaker:there because their mind is busier, but
Speaker:then I eventually get them back to the
Speaker:ones that have a lot of space in
Speaker:between and that can take you.
Speaker:Very quickly and very powerfully.
Speaker:Into that altered state.
Speaker:Love it, love it. It's
Speaker:called a meditation pr
Speaker:? actise for a reason, rightBecause it's
Speaker:like any, whether whether you're talking
Speaker:about sport or, or any field, it's like
Speaker:you have to practise it andyou have to
Speaker:get better. And, and I love what you see
Speaker:there. It's an exponential effect over
Speaker:time. I got into meditation.
Speaker:You mentioned the impact it has on your
Speaker:family, like because I was
Speaker:angry and I wrote in my.
Speaker:Journal I wanted like, how do I change
Speaker:this? And then I stumble across we
Speaker:talk about like, you know, focusing on
Speaker:what you want to focus on with that
Speaker:focus. I accidentally, of course, no
Speaker:accidents find this book that is a sports
Speaker:book but introduces me to meditation
Speaker:and wow, actually meditation makes me
Speaker:calmer and and I had the same
Speaker:experience of what you said. I'm starting
Speaker:to learn about meditation and they say
Speaker:you got to clear your mind and that
Speaker:wasn't my experience at all and that's
Speaker:why. I don't know if you've created the
Speaker:same thing, but I've created training to
Speaker:help people see that it's not about
Speaker:trying to clear the mind, it's actually
Speaker:about allowing the mind, giving it
Speaker:space. And, and as you, yeah, again,
Speaker:as you described us, that even if it's 30
Speaker:seconds of that bliss, it's, it's going
Speaker:to set you up for your whole day. And,
Speaker:and I look at it from a sporting
Speaker:perspective, if you want to call it
Speaker:visualisation or whatever you want to
Speaker:call it.
Speaker:that if you if meditation sounds scary,
Speaker:then call it visualisation and it and
Speaker:it's the same thing in terms of your
Speaker:preparation for the day. And and I love
Speaker:like I take my sporting teams through
Speaker:that before before we start the game is
Speaker:through a quick visualisation to help
Speaker:them feel more relaxed and grounded to
Speaker:see what they're going to do beforehand.
Speaker:You mentioned how speed.
Speaker:That presence comes on board. I was
Speaker:thinking about.
Speaker:The the Kart racing willpower's the
Speaker:Australian guy over there and I heard him
Speaker:interview talking about it's 300 miles an
Speaker:hour. They're on the doing on those
Speaker:tracks now for the Australians, that's
Speaker:like, do the math, right? That's
Speaker:like 400 and whatever kilometres an hour.
Speaker:That's ridiculous. But he talked about
Speaker:how it's you have to just be present
Speaker:and you have to find the gaps. You have
Speaker:to trust. So if they can do that at
Speaker:speed, bringing it back to a basic
Speaker:level that we can, it should be easy,
Speaker:right? It should be easy. And
Speaker:here's the thing. There's the difference
Speaker:between simple and easy, right? So
Speaker:things that are simple, they're so simple
Speaker:that it makes us go. What is wrong with
Speaker:me for not getting that? But it's
Speaker:because it's not easy and.
Speaker:Anything worthwhile
Speaker:requires, as you said, it
Speaker:requires practise. It requires and and
Speaker:then also some people shy away from pract
Speaker:ise. I don't need more stuff to do. Then
Speaker:let's just call it attention. What we
Speaker:put our attention on is what
Speaker:is going to grow in our lives. So if we
Speaker:spend time in negative thinking
Speaker:and worrying every day about what
Speaker:may happen with this and what may happen
Speaker:with that, and what somebody said to me
Speaker:or did to me or what I failed to do,
Speaker:that's what our life will be like. We
Speaker:will have more of that because that's
Speaker:where the attention is. So one of
Speaker:the other tools that. I use with people a
Speaker:lot, which is so simple.
Speaker:Again, it is right there in front of
Speaker:you 100% ofthe time is
Speaker:just go outside, get your
Speaker:feet on the ground, especially barefooted
Speaker:now where you are. You know, that might
Speaker:not be a great idea today. That's a
Speaker:little too cold. But
Speaker:Even so, you know, bundle up and get
Speaker:outside and look at the
Speaker:trees, look at if there's snow on the
Speaker:ground. Look at the sunshine,
Speaker:just be recognised
Speaker:that you're not separate from nature.
Speaker:You are nature, you are a part of
Speaker:nature. And when you see that that
Speaker:tree are those birds are not worried
Speaker:about a single thing, then it
Speaker:starts to bring that
Speaker:level of stress down
Speaker:because as you recognise that you're a
Speaker:part of that, you're connected to it. You
Speaker:can really start to get a feeling that
Speaker:everything. It's going to be OK
Speaker:that all is well.
Speaker:And it doesn't mean that we don't.
Speaker:You know, a lot of people feel like
Speaker:because they want so much practicality,
Speaker:they're like, yeah, but you can't just
Speaker:sit there and meditate. No, you have to
Speaker:take action. You have to take action in
Speaker:your life. But what the
Speaker:meditation, and I'm going to say in here
Speaker:as well, prayer, because a lot of people
Speaker:see prayer as, oh, you know, they may not
Speaker:be religious. And so I don't pray or I
Speaker:don't know how to pray. That's fine. It
Speaker:simply is a dialogue is all it is. So for
Speaker:me, I am in dialogue with
Speaker:God. You can call that higher power, you
Speaker:can call that the universe, whatever you
Speaker:want to call it. But what it is,
Speaker:regardless of what you call it, is it's
Speaker:the highest level of the energy
Speaker:of love, pure love.
Speaker:And that is where we want to
Speaker:tap into because that's where all of all
Speaker:of our power comes from. That's where all
Speaker:of the goodness comes from that we can
Speaker:experience in our lives. So you
Speaker:can dialogue. You don't have to just sit
Speaker:down. Say, OK, now I'm going to pray and
Speaker:meditate. You can just say I'm going to
Speaker:go outside now and be be present with
Speaker:everything that's there. Love it
Speaker:so good. I'm just trying to stay
Speaker:present here. So you talked before. You
Speaker:know what? That's the gift of animals
Speaker:right there. They're like, guess what?
Speaker:We're not going to get too serious.
Speaker:Yeah, so for the people who are listening
Speaker:and not watching my my cat here is he's
Speaker:trying to get my attention now you talked
Speaker:about. How cats or animals have
Speaker:that sort of intuitive? She's been
Speaker:rubbing, she's been rubbing against those
Speaker:books and I'm like, OK, what, what do I
Speaker:need to pay attention to those books? So
Speaker:he's the one she's pushed to the side,
Speaker:the one that she's pushed
Speaker:to the side.
Speaker:So people
Speaker:listening to
Speaker:this who who maybe they're
Speaker:they're not so intuitive. It might might
Speaker:be turning off now going what? What the
Speaker:fuck are these lunatic talking about?
Speaker:But I'll tell you, this cat has helped me
Speaker:in coaching that many times where she's
Speaker:gone, she's standing there staring at
Speaker:something, whether it's a word or a book.
Speaker:And I'm like, oh, I asked the client,
Speaker:what does this mean to you? And they're
Speaker:like, Oh my God, like, how do you know
Speaker:about that? I'm like, I don't know. It
Speaker:was the cat. Anyway, she's drawing me to
Speaker:the Andre Agassi book open, right.
Speaker:So the story I'm drawn to there
Speaker:is, I don't know if you've read it, but
Speaker:he talked about, I think he called it the
Speaker:Dragon, the ball machine.
Speaker:The relentless like his dad made him
Speaker:stand in front of this machine to the
Speaker:point that he that he hated the sport.
Speaker:I did not know that. That's interesting.
Speaker:Yeah, he talked about
Speaker:how much he hated tennis,
Speaker:so. I'm just going
Speaker:to do this. Let's let's go back to your
Speaker:sporting journey. You said to me you've
Speaker:been a lifelong athlete. What? Where did
Speaker:sports start for you?Oh
Speaker:my goodness, you know.
Speaker:Very, very natural. OK, wow, I'm
Speaker:getting this beautiful visual image right
Speaker:now. When I was a
Speaker:really little girl, my
Speaker:granddad and I would go out in the
Speaker:front yard and he would pitch the ball to
Speaker:me because I loved softball and
Speaker:he would pitch it to me and I would catch
Speaker:and throw back to him. And first of all,
Speaker:I loved him. I was really connected to
Speaker:him. And that time spent with
Speaker:him was so special for me.
Speaker:And he would teach me this lesson,
Speaker:which, again, it applies in all of
Speaker:life. He would say, keep your eye on the
Speaker:bowl, keep your eye on the ball. Turned
Speaker:out that I ended up being a home run
Speaker:hitter and a lot of the other girls on my
Speaker:softball teams were a lot bigger than me.
Speaker:And I used to have a lot of fun. When
Speaker:I would come up to bat and my team, my
Speaker:coaches love this, I would come up to
Speaker:bat. The other team with a lot of really
Speaker:athletic, bigger girls would go moving.
Speaker:You know, they're thinking, you know,
Speaker:this is going to be easy. And I'd be
Speaker:like, yeah, move in, go ahead, move in.
Speaker:And I'm like, 'cause I know how to keep
Speaker:my eye on the ball, 'cause my granddaddy
Speaker:taught me. And so I would just be like,
Speaker:like, slug that thing and all
Speaker:the way out of bounds and everybody would
Speaker:come in. And so I learned to just
Speaker:love. The the
Speaker:physicality. Of sports,
Speaker:because I truly believe,
Speaker:and this is especially for a lot of
Speaker:women, that in order for us to be
Speaker:balanced and, and I'm going to say this
Speaker:is men too, but I'm kind of speaking
Speaker:especially to women right now in order to
Speaker:be really balanced and feel
Speaker:whole and feel good in your body
Speaker:and in your emotions and your spiritual
Speaker:connections, you have to be.
Speaker:Balanced in your masculine and feminine
Speaker:energy now, unfortunately with a lot
Speaker:of women, the way that we work these
Speaker:days. A lot of women are are
Speaker:in their masculine so much in the work
Speaker:zone that they're not in touch with their
Speaker:feminine qualities. But early
Speaker:on, my granddad working with me, I
Speaker:was learning how to channel
Speaker:energy because as I'm
Speaker:sure you can probably tell, I'm a person
Speaker:with a lot of energy. And if I just
Speaker:sit and let that, what that's going to
Speaker:result in is too much thinking and then
Speaker:confusion. So I've. Get moving so
Speaker:I can get that energy out of my
Speaker:body in order to get a good night's
Speaker:sleep. So sports is a
Speaker:way that I can channel some of that
Speaker:aggressive energy and have
Speaker:fun and be competitive
Speaker:in in a really healthy
Speaker:way. And I just have a
Speaker:real a real love for that. More than
Speaker:anything, I'm competing with myself.
Speaker:Because I'm always looking to how can I
Speaker:do? And skiing as a sport where you're
Speaker:never going to beat it. I don't care how
Speaker:good you are, you're never going to beat
Speaker:that course. So it's fun because you're
Speaker:like, I can do better today. How can I do
Speaker:more today? You know, So I just have
Speaker:a real love for that. And I would say
Speaker:that that's a great way for women
Speaker:to engage in moving
Speaker:and channelling some of that more
Speaker:aggressive energy. Because
Speaker:what we have not talked about
Speaker:is our sex life too. And a
Speaker:lot of people, if they're disconnected
Speaker:from their sex life. They're also not
Speaker:channelling. That very,
Speaker:very powerful and
Speaker:important physical energy that's got
Speaker:to move through the body.
Speaker:So that was a lot packed in there.
Speaker:Hopefully that answered your question a
Speaker:little bit. Yeah, we will come back to
Speaker:that because that's something I wanted to
Speaker:talk about that, that creative energy
Speaker:that comes from sexual energy. There's so
Speaker:much misrepresentation and
Speaker:and areas that have been made to
Speaker:be people to be shameful about or
Speaker:guilty about all these different things.
Speaker:So we'll come back to that. That's going
Speaker:to be a good one for particularly how we
Speaker:redirect that energy into.
Speaker:Performance, whether that's sport,
Speaker:business, bedroom, whatever it is you
Speaker:talk there about your granddad. I,
Speaker:I do work with young
Speaker:athletes, but mostly with their parents,
Speaker:right? And, and creating the sort of
Speaker:environment that you described there that
Speaker:that is conducive to good performance.
Speaker:What was it about that experience with
Speaker:your granddad that made it so fun
Speaker:but also got you to perform at that level?
Speaker:You know, I feel the emotion rising up in
Speaker:me right now as you ask that because
Speaker:ultimately all goodness comes from
Speaker:love. It's all about love. It's all about
Speaker:love. And when we can
Speaker:put aside everything,
Speaker:all the chains that bind us and
Speaker:say I am going to show up in an
Speaker:attitude and in the presence of love no
Speaker:matter what. Brilliant things happen.
Speaker:Brilliant things. So I could
Speaker:feel my grandfather's love for
Speaker:me, the way that he cared for me, the
Speaker:way that he wanted to see me succeed
Speaker:and his. His
Speaker:compassion and his gentleness. And so
Speaker:this is so important for men to know.
Speaker:My granddaddy was one strong
Speaker:dude. I mean, my sister is an artist and
Speaker:she had drew a picture of him as a child
Speaker:of, of my granddaddy lifting a Bale of
Speaker:hay. And if you don't know anything about
Speaker:a Bale of hay, that's not really even
Speaker:possible. You know, that's like a
Speaker:really, really heavy deal there. And so
Speaker:he he was so strong. He was a farmer
Speaker:and worked with his hands his whole life.
Speaker:And even up to his passing at
Speaker:age 94. He
Speaker:was so strong. My dad said
Speaker:when he pulled me down to his bedside to
Speaker:whisper to me at 94, he said, you
Speaker:cannot imagine the strength that that man
Speaker:still had. So we're talking about a
Speaker:strong. Physical presence, a
Speaker:masculine man, and
Speaker:yet the love and the
Speaker:tenderness that he could show
Speaker:that right there means everything. And
Speaker:my father. Was also
Speaker:that kind of man and what I can tell
Speaker:you guys, any guys listening to
Speaker:this, I'm going to tell you there is
Speaker:nothing better than you can do for your
Speaker:daughter, for your wife, for the women in
Speaker:your life. Than to love them
Speaker:and bring your masculine energy
Speaker:in a loving way and
Speaker:forget about all of those things where
Speaker:you can't show emotions. Show it, let it
Speaker:out, show your love because it it means
Speaker:everything and will make all the
Speaker:difference in the way that that
Speaker:girl becomes a woman and
Speaker:relates to men. It will make all the
Speaker:difference in her life. Absolutely. And
Speaker:for boys too, you know, to raise boys in
Speaker:a way where they're not fearful to be
Speaker:connected to people, you know. Yeah,
Speaker:'cause they're absorbing what they see in
Speaker:US of either preparing them to be the man
Speaker:or preparing them to like the sort of man
Speaker:they want to connect with.
Speaker:I think the, the key thing that you said
Speaker:there is like, we have to be,
Speaker:we still need to have that strong male
Speaker:presence. I think there's been too much
Speaker:made of like men showing emotion
Speaker:and, and it's become too far the other
Speaker:way, which is why men don't relate to it.
Speaker:But it's like it's strong physically,
Speaker:strong mentally. Emotionally, but still
Speaker:allowing yourself that space to show the
Speaker:emotion it creates what you describe
Speaker:there, it creates an environment which
Speaker:makes your emotional thinking about it
Speaker:because it was so special. And that's,
Speaker:that's the opportunity we have as
Speaker:parents, as as
Speaker:coaches, as as leaders, to be able to
Speaker:create more environments like that to
Speaker:empower young people to, to be able to
Speaker:then go and emulate that. We need
Speaker:we. We are really in need of
Speaker:strong masculine
Speaker:leaders. Who are
Speaker:my father LED thousands of
Speaker:people in his life. He was a youth leader
Speaker:for a long, long time. And then so many
Speaker:of those people, when they grew up, they
Speaker:were like, can you still teach us? And,
Speaker:you know, can we still if people show up
Speaker:to the house? And he
Speaker:was just so loving that he just
Speaker:magnetised people to him.
Speaker:And he was never afraid to show
Speaker:his emotions, show his love for other
Speaker:people and it didn't matter. Where we
Speaker:were, we went to a restaurant, we went to
Speaker:the gas station, wherever we were, people
Speaker:were just magnetised to him because he
Speaker:was present with them. He was right there
Speaker:with them. He truly cared for them and
Speaker:was not afraid to show that. But
Speaker:he was all masculine, you know,
Speaker:So there was just No
Speaker:Fear of showing that part of him. And
Speaker:that's, you know, that's the difference
Speaker:between I think.
Speaker:Getting. A little bit confused between
Speaker:what love looks like as an
Speaker:action and what love is
Speaker:like as an emotion. Because they're not
Speaker:the same thing. People can get
Speaker:caught up in their emotions. And that's
Speaker:why a lot of men are afraid sometimes to
Speaker:really show that. Because sometimes
Speaker:women who get caught up in their emotions
Speaker:and things get chaotic and then men pull
Speaker:away when it comes to that because they
Speaker:don't, it's overwhelming. They don't know
Speaker:what to do. That that's when love
Speaker:is more at an emotional level, but
Speaker:when you can take it up to a level of
Speaker:action and say, what does this mean?
Speaker:What action can I take right now?
Speaker:Where can I be useful? Where can I be
Speaker:helpful? And sometimes all you
Speaker:need to do is be present with that
Speaker:person. That's all you need to do.
Speaker:And it's from someone like myself who I'm
Speaker:a I'm an extrovert so I might rather be
Speaker:having a conversation. If I have to sit
Speaker:down and do more detailed focus work,
Speaker:sometimes I just need someone there. They
Speaker:'d have to say anything. It's just a
Speaker:presence. And that
Speaker:makes me laugh because I think about ask
Speaker:my wife to help me with some detailed
Speaker:stuff and she'll just stand there and
Speaker:I'll get started and she'll stand there
Speaker:for a couple of minutes and she goes, do
Speaker:you actually need my help? I'm like,
Speaker:yeah, just stay there. Tell
Speaker:her it's I had I had a coach
Speaker:who specialises in ADDand ADHD,
Speaker:which for me is. Creative mind,
Speaker:right? And I have this woman who helped
Speaker:me years ago with some things and a
Speaker:couple of terms that she taught me, which
Speaker:I really like. 1 is called a body
Speaker:double and the other is called a
Speaker:believing mirror. They're basically the
Speaker:same thing, just a couple of different
Speaker:terms to help understand it. But
Speaker:that is literally for the creative mind
Speaker:or for the busy mind when you have
Speaker:someone present like that. Talk about
Speaker:that energy. It can bring scattered
Speaker:energy levels down. Sort of level
Speaker:them out, OK and and clear
Speaker:some confusion, but it's just a body
Speaker:double. It's just somebody else there
Speaker:just to be there and it changes
Speaker:everything. Yeah, absolutely.
Speaker:I try to avoid the the labels and the
Speaker:diagnosis and that sort of thing. But
Speaker:but it was that was exactly what I
Speaker:learned is like is that sometimes with
Speaker:ADHD you just need someone there to be
Speaker:exactly what you described there. I love
Speaker:those. I love those terms. Growing
Speaker:up, growing up, my believing mirror was
Speaker:my older brother created that space when
Speaker:I was like learning sport and and
Speaker:creating that space and much the same
Speaker:as what you described with your granddad.
Speaker:Really cool. If I can dig a
Speaker:little bit because it's this is like from
Speaker:my own personal experience, but I also
Speaker:see it so much out there with with dads
Speaker:and their their children.
Speaker:My dad was similar in that he was a
Speaker:youth leader and he was often helping so
Speaker:many other people. And at times I felt
Speaker:like I was sort of left out of that,
Speaker:which is a guess is why my brother played
Speaker:a lot of that role. Can you identify with
Speaker:that? That disconnects with your dad to a
Speaker:certain degree because he because there's
Speaker:only so much of him can go around. I
Speaker:think it, you know,
Speaker:there's. Well, I was going to say
Speaker:something that's really not true. At
Speaker:first I was thinking it might be
Speaker:different with a father and a son, but
Speaker:not really because there are plenty of
Speaker:daughters who same thing that their dad
Speaker:is so busy. I didn't have
Speaker:that. I mean, my dad was.
Speaker:I remember my sister asking
Speaker:him one day and and this is
Speaker:really his answer is just really the
Speaker:essence of my upbringing.
Speaker:She said, Daddy, you know, how did you do
Speaker:it with two little girls who were
Speaker:loud and wild and,
Speaker:you know, playing instruments and crazy
Speaker:around the house? How did you come
Speaker:home?From a day at work
Speaker:and then deal with that
Speaker:and he said Oh my
Speaker:gosh baby, he goes, it was the favourite
Speaker:part of my day coming home to you girls
Speaker:and your mother. And The thing is
Speaker:that was real for him. So whatever
Speaker:been going on during the day,
Speaker:he knew that. His
Speaker:home. He and my mother created
Speaker:a home where this was the
Speaker:sanctuary. And it was. First, it
Speaker:came first, so putting for my
Speaker:parents God first and then
Speaker:their relationship with one another
Speaker:second. So I grew up
Speaker:watching a couple who
Speaker:adored one another and we're best
Speaker:friends until the end. So it
Speaker:wasn't a, you know, it wasn't a
Speaker:relationship of oh, they've been married
Speaker:for 50 years now and it's just like
Speaker:roommates like so many people. They were
Speaker:still spontaneous. They seemed like
Speaker:teenagers sometimes looking at each other
Speaker:because they kept it like that. So
Speaker:coming up in that environment.
Speaker:I always felt that I
Speaker:could go to my parents, that I could
Speaker:share what I needed to with them.
Speaker:And I, you know, I, I
Speaker:really am very
Speaker:aware that
Speaker:I have very different upbringing than
Speaker:most people. A
Speaker:real blessing. And that is part of the
Speaker:reason why I feel
Speaker:so much desire to help other people
Speaker:because I know that that level of
Speaker:love is real, that it's
Speaker:available, that people can create it in
Speaker:their homes and in their families because
Speaker:I lived it. And so I
Speaker:want to say, hey, this is real and you
Speaker:can do this. Love it.
Speaker:Tell me if you get into coaching what you
Speaker:have and and a whole lot of other areas
Speaker:that you help the world. From
Speaker:my experience, there's always a back
Speaker:story of of what you've had to overcome
Speaker:to then end up in that space. What was
Speaker:there a particular moment or event that
Speaker:led you down a path of of wanting to then
Speaker:help people?I
Speaker:wouldn't say there was a particular
Speaker:moment, but you know, life is a journey.
Speaker:So there are all these markers
Speaker:throughout our lives that you can
Speaker:point to. For one thing, if you talk
Speaker:to close friends of mine and if I say
Speaker:something and I think, oh gosh, you know,
Speaker:and I don't do this anymore, but years
Speaker:ago I remember saying to a friend, I know
Speaker:you might think this is weird, but I
Speaker:woke up in the middle of the night and I.
Speaker:My grandmother was standing there in my
Speaker:room, who was deceased, by the way.
Speaker:And, you know, there was a light around
Speaker:her. And all I could feel was just
Speaker:so much love, so much love coming from
Speaker:her. And it was such a real
Speaker:experience. And I remember my friend
Speaker:saying to me, she goes, she goes, why
Speaker:would you think that? I'm going to think
Speaker:that's weird. She goes, you've been
Speaker:telling me things like that since we were
Speaker:children. I'm like, I have. And she's
Speaker:like, yes, Kevin, she goes, it's not what
Speaker:you do. Who you are, so you can't
Speaker:hide that. But the deal is,
Speaker:though, I really kept
Speaker:that under wraps, I
Speaker:thought anyway to people
Speaker:who were not as close to me because I
Speaker:thought they're going to think that's
Speaker:weird or whatever it is.
Speaker:Well. Throughout life
Speaker:there are markers where you know,
Speaker:somebody loses a parent, somebody loses a
Speaker:friend, and in recent years,
Speaker:so the last.
Speaker:Several years of my life have been
Speaker:heavy, heavy loss, including the loss of
Speaker:my only daughter and.
Speaker:Then becoming my father's caretaker and
Speaker:being with him for
Speaker:several years until he passed. And
Speaker:I've been with a lot of
Speaker:people during their last days
Speaker:or been with people while they were
Speaker:going through the last days of a loved
Speaker:one. And because of what's
Speaker:always been natural to me from childhood.
Speaker:I've seen that death
Speaker:for me is simply a part of the
Speaker:natural world we live in. So I'm
Speaker:very able to help people with
Speaker:grief. And so those things kind of come
Speaker:up very naturally. And after my
Speaker:daughter passed, I, I even created a
Speaker:course, it's called Beyond
Speaker:Religion, how to Pray and Get
Speaker:Answers because I realised. What do
Speaker:people do if they don't have training?
Speaker:And how to move through
Speaker:grief that it can really get stuck and
Speaker:cause so many problems in a persons life.
Speaker:And it occurred to me that when
Speaker:when you have certain abilities and
Speaker:skills that those
Speaker:that's not meant just for you, that's
Speaker:meant for you to share and help others.
Speaker:Because otherwise it becomes like a
Speaker:why? Why do I have all this? Why is this
Speaker:even here? Oh, I see, it's meant for all
Speaker:of us. Yeah, so
Speaker:anybody who has a skill with anything,
Speaker:it's there so that you can help others
Speaker:along the way 'cause we're, we're all in
Speaker:this together, you know?
Speaker:Absolutely. My example would be
Speaker:crazy stuff with cats pointing me to
Speaker:questions to ask and all that sort of
Speaker:stuff I wouldn't have talked about a few
Speaker:years ago. It's the actual
Speaker:interviewer. You know,
Speaker:the moment we addressed the book, she's
Speaker:gone and sat down there calmly
Speaker:and quietly. Isn't that interesting?
Speaker:That was interesting. So if we
Speaker:bring it back to that, because obviously
Speaker:that was a significant moment.
Speaker:When when you.
Speaker:A young athlete growing up, how do you
Speaker:then transition into?
Speaker:Becoming a coach.
Speaker:One I imagine was, well, I don't know,
Speaker:was it coaching sport first?
Speaker:And then into coaching people with a
Speaker:broader level or how did all that unfold?
Speaker:You know, that's it's an interesting
Speaker:question because if I, you know, if I put
Speaker:it through a timeline, you know, again,
Speaker:it's all very natural because
Speaker:it wasn't, it wasn't a choice
Speaker:so much from it wasn't a choice from my
Speaker:thinking mind to say, Hey, I know what
Speaker:I'm going to do. It was more a
Speaker:natural progression that people just
Speaker:came. Me anyway, and I
Speaker:asked my dad one day I said I don't know
Speaker:why this was, you know,
Speaker:this is probably early
Speaker:20s. I said something to my dad. I
Speaker:said I don't know why people
Speaker:come to me and ask me about this that and
Speaker:the other. I'm like, why would they think
Speaker:I would know anything about that? And he
Speaker:said because baby he goes, you
Speaker:have. A A way of
Speaker:being with people that they feel like
Speaker:they can trust you. And I'm like, well,
Speaker:yeah, which they can, you know, So it's
Speaker:natural. It's not so much that
Speaker:they're saying, oh, I bet she knows
Speaker:about this. It's more that they're
Speaker:saying, oh, that is a person that I
Speaker:can tell I'm safe with her. I can
Speaker:trust her. I need to open up to someone.
Speaker:So maybe I'll ask her about this. So it's
Speaker:more that so when people just come to you
Speaker:naturally. After some
Speaker:time, you have to, you know,
Speaker:it's, it's kind of like you notice. All
Speaker:right, if this happens now. Maybe that's
Speaker:a clue that I need to say
Speaker:yes, I can do this for you.
Speaker:So at that point I did
Speaker:start engaging in some more training for
Speaker:myself. So getting a certification
Speaker:as a high performance coach
Speaker:and which is not something that I needed,
Speaker:it's just something I wanted to do it. It
Speaker:added a layer of.
Speaker:Of help that I could give to people
Speaker:because people come at
Speaker:problems from different angles some
Speaker:people may want a more.
Speaker:You know, boots on the ground, solution
Speaker:based approach to
Speaker:solving a problem. And I'm always
Speaker:going to get them to the point where
Speaker:they realise though thatthat is a
Speaker:surface level approach. We can do
Speaker:that, but it's not going to be it's not
Speaker:going to be where the power is. Okay. And
Speaker:so I've also taken
Speaker:a lot of different courses and spent
Speaker:really a lifetime. Diving
Speaker:into spiritual studies so
Speaker:that I can look broadly
Speaker:at.
Speaker:Religions. But again that
Speaker:when you get above the dogma of
Speaker:religions, you see that at the highest
Speaker:level love is there and
Speaker:love across the board is a high
Speaker:level of energy that doesn't need to be
Speaker:defined by certain
Speaker:rules within an
Speaker:organisation. Not that those are not
Speaker:good for certain things, but
Speaker:studying that helps me be able
Speaker:to. Speak to speak
Speaker:with a broader range of
Speaker:situations and personality
Speaker:types. And
Speaker:you know, and then also being an
Speaker:intuitive, there are just times when I'm
Speaker:around people and I know on an
Speaker:energetic level that they are
Speaker:reaching out for connection and they may
Speaker:not be able to say that. And I
Speaker:don't ever say something to someone
Speaker:like. Oh,
Speaker:Gee, it looks like maybe you just lost
Speaker:your dad. I can feel his presence around
Speaker:you. Because they could just freak
Speaker:somebody out. But what I might say
Speaker:if I'm picking up on that energy is to
Speaker:just open a conversation that's just
Speaker:very natural wherever we are. Maybe point
Speaker:to something that we're both looking at.
Speaker:It starts a natural conversation. And I
Speaker:find that people just open up on their
Speaker:own because all they want is to be
Speaker:seen. To be known. To be
Speaker:understood, to be loved, that's the
Speaker:basis for all of us. So again, it just
Speaker:goes back to being present and when it
Speaker:comes to. Sports and
Speaker:music, because those are such a
Speaker:big part of my life and and music on the
Speaker:professional end, I noticed
Speaker:many years ago that my sweet spot
Speaker:where I love to be even
Speaker:more even more than being on stage is in
Speaker:a room in rehearsal with. The
Speaker:musicians that I've worked with forever,
Speaker:because talk about being in a
Speaker:zone. We are communicating with one
Speaker:another on a deeply intimate level with
Speaker:no words, and we're learning
Speaker:things from each other and coming
Speaker:together in a way that when we do go on
Speaker:that stage, we know each other
Speaker:in this otherworldly way.
Speaker:So that if if a snag
Speaker:happens, if somebody misses a beat
Speaker:in a performance, you don't stop. Say,
Speaker:oh, wait, what are we doing? I thought we
Speaker:were doing this. We do that in the
Speaker:zone. It's like, oh, look, someone went
Speaker:there. Look what? We're going to flow
Speaker:over here because they're there. Let's
Speaker:just keep flowing. And the audience never
Speaker:knows the difference. And we can look at
Speaker:each other and go, you know, and
Speaker:acknowledge, but go, yeah, I got you, you
Speaker:know, and keep rolling. And it's it's
Speaker:it's like love making. It's this
Speaker:beautiful connected thing.
Speaker:And in sports, I noticed, you know
Speaker:what with this. Course
Speaker:I don't have to teach someone how to
Speaker:ski the obstacle course. They don't have
Speaker:to know anything about skiing, but I can
Speaker:bring them out to the obstacle course.
Speaker:And the lake where I ski is owned
Speaker:by a professional coach.
Speaker:And so I love
Speaker:doing things where I bring them out and
Speaker:give them a lesson with him so they just
Speaker:have a day of fun learning how to ski on
Speaker:two skis, even just getting up out of the
Speaker:water. And then I would do the second
Speaker:half of the day like. Debrief and
Speaker:people would open up and just talk about
Speaker:their business life or their marriage or
Speaker:whatever. This is like in a small group
Speaker:setting. And I found over and
Speaker:over that whatever they brought up, I
Speaker:would say, Oh my gosh, do you remember
Speaker:when you were out on the water? What did
Speaker:he tell you about? And this light bulb
Speaker:would go off and then they're like, Oh my
Speaker:gosh, it's the same thing. And I'm like,
Speaker:right, it is getting in that
Speaker:flow pattern. Of communication.
Speaker:With all that is so it ends up working
Speaker:in every area of your life. And I just I
Speaker:find that fascinating. It keeps life
Speaker:always interesting and always
Speaker:exciting. Yeah. So
Speaker:it's it's it's like there's not an exact.
Speaker:Oh, I went and I learned and I did this.
Speaker:It's more of an intuitive. Oh, look,
Speaker:these are these layers. This goes with
Speaker:this goes with this and this. Yeah.
Speaker:And that and that comes back to the trust
Speaker:in the intuition of, well, he's the next
Speaker:logical thing, which is how I ended up.
Speaker:With going from also working in grief to
Speaker:now a sports podcast because that was
Speaker:what life was showing me was where I
Speaker:needed to be. They were reaching out on
Speaker:the sporting space like, yeah,
Speaker:it was a whole raft of things. But it's
Speaker:just one of those those nudges. And it's
Speaker:funny what you talked about there around
Speaker:the coaching when I was like, I've been
Speaker:coaching in sports since I was a teen,
Speaker:but when I'm then naturally coaching in
Speaker:corporate and I'm getting people saying
Speaker:to me, oh, you're quite good at this. Or
Speaker:they're getting people from other
Speaker:departments to come and do some coaching
Speaker:with me and you go, oh,
Speaker:maybe, maybe I should be doing this full
Speaker:time. And it's amazing how,
Speaker:yeah, if you, if you, you know, as you're
Speaker:saying, you said something there when you
Speaker:were talking about sports just now. It's
Speaker:the entry point. So
Speaker:people need their different entry points
Speaker:where we can enter in because, you know,
Speaker:going back to what we all need being
Speaker:seen. Understood having
Speaker:knowing that there are other people along
Speaker:the path who with so much chaos in the
Speaker:world and so many, so many people who are
Speaker:willing to tear others down.
Speaker:People need to know that there are people
Speaker:along the path who want to elevate
Speaker:you, who want to see the best in you,
Speaker:want to lift you up. And so for
Speaker:those of us who want to provide that.
Speaker:How do you get someone to
Speaker:engage in that?Because they may be
Speaker:coming from different entry points. Is it
Speaker:sports, Is it music? Is it in the
Speaker:corporate world or is it in their
Speaker:business life? They're an entrepreneur,
Speaker:They own a small business. Is it through
Speaker:their marriage and they're having issues
Speaker:there. Lots and lots of different entry
Speaker:points, but all leading to the same place
Speaker:of elevating life. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker:and, and. What's like if I look at it
Speaker:from that, that sport perspective is I've
Speaker:never had a lot of people, even the
Speaker:guests on the podcast saying.
Speaker:Sport was my safe place
Speaker:and always
Speaker:because they had a really influential
Speaker:coach who created that safe space that
Speaker:you were talking about. And then
Speaker:what you described there around the
Speaker:musicians like that connected team, like
Speaker:the best performances that I can think of
Speaker:from a team perspective were always that.
Speaker:And it's part of what I like bringing to
Speaker:that, that sports coaching element is
Speaker:let's create that sort of connection
Speaker:because that's when. Even when it feels
Speaker:like a mistake, it ends up being perfect
Speaker:because you've just got that level of
Speaker:connection and like you said, no, no one
Speaker:notices. On the outside it just looks
Speaker:amazing and it doesn't even matter
Speaker:anyway. You know, now you,
Speaker:you have to do your work and be
Speaker:prepared because nobody cares about going
Speaker:and seeing a train wreck because nobody
Speaker:prepared. But when you do your work and
Speaker:you do prepare and then you show up
Speaker:together. We all love seeing
Speaker:that connectivity because as as a
Speaker:performer, as a musician.
Speaker:The audience is also a part of that.
Speaker:That's one thing I love. So it wouldn't
Speaker:matter if we were all up there doing our
Speaker:thing and looking great and performing
Speaker:great. If there wasn't an audience there
Speaker:to be in it with us. It it
Speaker:works in tandem, then it wouldn't really
Speaker:matter. And if you have, I mean, we've
Speaker:all been to concerts where you
Speaker:see, or a sports team anything
Speaker:or a corporate team where people
Speaker:are. So siloed within
Speaker:themselves that they're not present with
Speaker:and they're not understanding others
Speaker:within their team. And so you have all
Speaker:these individuals that are operating
Speaker:separately and it doesn't
Speaker:work. There's no juice there.
Speaker:There's no soul in it. But when
Speaker:people can prepare themselves as
Speaker:individuals and then they come
Speaker:to and see the others as
Speaker:also. Souls that are
Speaker:here to walk this walk or to play the
Speaker:game together. Oh,
Speaker:magic happens and that
Speaker:again. I'm going to stay because I
Speaker:believe it is so, so important. I've done
Speaker:a lot of work in this area that
Speaker:when a husband and wife come together,
Speaker:there are way too many marriages where
Speaker:people are not having sex. Sex
Speaker:is the glue. That
Speaker:makes things
Speaker:just problems that just
Speaker:disappear. Why? Because when
Speaker:you come together and have a lot of women
Speaker:who I've heard say, well, why should I
Speaker:give him sex? He's not doing XYZ and I'm
Speaker:like, girl, that is not what it's about.
Speaker:OK? This is about coming together to
Speaker:go. Let's, let's give each other
Speaker:pleasure. Let's help one another enjoy
Speaker:this life and offload some stress and
Speaker:play together and have fun. And then you
Speaker:know what, whatever that stressful thing
Speaker:that was happening, it's like, who cares?
Speaker:I'm going to cut this bit out. The men
Speaker:are going to love that clip. But but it's
Speaker:true, right? Like, and I've coached a lot
Speaker:of men where that's exactly the case.
Speaker:It's like the sex stops and then
Speaker:everything gets really challenging
Speaker:because there's a disconnect. And, and I
Speaker:remember one person saying, well, it's
Speaker:not, it's not that important, isn't it?
Speaker:I'm like, it's pretty important because
Speaker:if you're not, if you're not able to
Speaker:connect on that level, well then.
Speaker:It's yeah, it's a, it's a, it's a path
Speaker:towards. Bigger problems,
Speaker:I want to come back to that because
Speaker:that's the thing I want to talk about.
Speaker:But you, you talk there about that, about
Speaker:the sporting perspective, really
Speaker:important point it's you're also
Speaker:connecting to the audience. So whether
Speaker:it's community level where it's you
Speaker:engage the parents and, and
Speaker:the, the community. If everyone's on the
Speaker:same page, then that's when magic
Speaker:happens. That's what's happening at my
Speaker:local club now. They've got, they've had
Speaker:some, some people running the show for
Speaker:the last sort of 5-10 years that have
Speaker:that. On that, they've connected the
Speaker:community and also drawn to one of
Speaker:the he's like the
Speaker:longest serving and and most successful
Speaker:coaches here in in one of our
Speaker:competitions. And I remember him saying
Speaker:Wayne Bennett for the Australians
Speaker:listening. He talked about how hard it
Speaker:was to win a premiership or the
Speaker:championship, as you would call it US and
Speaker:and these things need to be present and
Speaker:it was only about four or five things,
Speaker:but one of them was and the collective.
Speaker:Will of the fans. All pulling
Speaker:in the same direction. And, and it's
Speaker:like, I don't know whether he understands
Speaker:that sort of energy side of things
Speaker:or whether it's something he's learned or
Speaker:what what it was. But that's something
Speaker:that struck me. I don't remember hearing
Speaker:that 10 years ago. And it struck me as
Speaker:like, wow, that's really interesting. He
Speaker:understands the power and I watch the
Speaker:best coaches in the world, They
Speaker:engage the fans.
Speaker:Not not in a false way. Engaging the fans
Speaker:doesn't mean son, if you autographs and
Speaker:and mentioning, Oh, we need to have no,
Speaker:no, they're actually connect with them
Speaker:and and the fans connect back.
Speaker:Yeah, absolutely. Because people didn't
Speaker:feel like a family. We're a part of a
Speaker:movement together. We care about things
Speaker:together. And I think people really,
Speaker:really people really need that.
Speaker:And. And musicians too, like you think
Speaker:about the best shows, you feel like
Speaker:you're there with them. It's a sort of a
Speaker:one person show because they're
Speaker:connecting to you. And I've also heard
Speaker:that we'll talk about, you know, artists
Speaker:and they go, I wasn't so good. Like, he
Speaker:was a bit boring. And what I took from
Speaker:that is actually there was no connection.
Speaker:No connection, no soul, Right.
Speaker:So Kim, let's bring it back to what you
Speaker:mentioned earlier on in the conversation,
Speaker:which is around sexual energy and how you
Speaker:can, it's creative energy and how you can
Speaker:use it in lots of different areas and
Speaker:what the note I took down at the time
Speaker:was. To get some ideas
Speaker:for people yes, you've talked about the
Speaker:importance of having that connection with
Speaker:your partner, how that
Speaker:is a very much a stress reliever.
Speaker:I loved how you described that. Well, you
Speaker:know what give like give him
Speaker:sex like what? What he's not doing this,
Speaker:this and this. And it's like it's now
Speaker:making an unconditional, right? It's
Speaker:like, yes, there's all the stuff going on
Speaker:there. What's the importance of that? And
Speaker:how can people understand that? How they
Speaker:can use that energy, whether it's through
Speaker:intimacy or actually just how, when they
Speaker:have that energy come through, which we
Speaker:all do at different times, sometimes
Speaker:randomly, sometimes not, how do they then
Speaker:channel that into a fuel that will help
Speaker:them across all areas of their life?
Speaker:Because I know this is an area of
Speaker:expertise for you. Yeah, you know
Speaker:the and. Who knows
Speaker:how this became an area of expertise. I'm
Speaker:going to say, you know, it's like what?
Speaker:I'm going to say it's, it's divine
Speaker:guidance that led me to that. Because at
Speaker:some point, I think the way that I was
Speaker:raised, I wasn't raised to be
Speaker:fearful of sexuality. And it wasn't
Speaker:like it was this major topic in
Speaker:our household. But there was also not
Speaker:any sense of guilt and shame or anything
Speaker:like that. So it just, it was. On issue,
Speaker:you know, and at some point
Speaker:maybe in college, I
Speaker:recognised how many
Speaker:people felt so much guilt and
Speaker:shame around the issue of
Speaker:sex. And then I noticed
Speaker:I'm like, I questioned is this me or is
Speaker:this a thing? I started noticing how much
Speaker:it was connected to their thoughts about
Speaker:religion so. You know, I
Speaker:thought about that on and off, on and
Speaker:off, and then. Tying that in
Speaker:with my life as a musician, you
Speaker:know, I've been in rock bands with guys
Speaker:for. A lifetime and
Speaker:rock'n'roll. Let's face it,
Speaker:it's it's all about sex. OK, so
Speaker:and when I say that, I don't
Speaker:mean like the
Speaker:stories about dudes and bands going out
Speaker:and finding groupies. That's not what I'm
Speaker:talking about. I'm talking about the
Speaker:energy, the energy of it.
Speaker:Because people can act like they don't
Speaker:know all they want, but all you have to
Speaker:do is crank that up. And if you listen to
Speaker:that bass, what you're doing is. You're
Speaker:feeling a frequency that is
Speaker:matching in your body, so your
Speaker:cells are literally moving to
Speaker:that frequency. That movement is
Speaker:happening, and that creates
Speaker:stimulation within the body.
Speaker:So lower frequencies
Speaker:connect specifically to lower
Speaker:regions in the body. So we feel
Speaker:that. We feel a stimulation. We're at a
Speaker:rock concerts, like, yeah, baby, we're
Speaker:going to go home and boom, you know?
Speaker:To not get too graphic on your podcast,
Speaker:right? So that that's like
Speaker:just this, it's this awesome,
Speaker:beautiful energy. And if you think about
Speaker:the energy of let's say higher
Speaker:frequency instruments like the flute or
Speaker:like violin.
Speaker:That tends to stimulate more upper
Speaker:regions, so think about it if you're
Speaker:hearing the flute. You don't
Speaker:feel that in your lower body. You
Speaker:feel that it's ethereal. It
Speaker:feels light and you feel it up here.
Speaker:And you can experiment with this. When
Speaker:you hear me talk about this, if it if it
Speaker:sounds foreign, just turn on some music
Speaker:and experiment with it and you will feel
Speaker:what I'm talking about. OK, Crank up that
Speaker:face, listen to some ACDC and then tell
Speaker:me if you're not going. Girl's got
Speaker:rhythm, right?
Speaker:So. I'm saying
Speaker:the frequencies that correspond in our
Speaker:bodies, we, we can't
Speaker:get, you know, deep into this here on the
Speaker:podcast, but are you familiar with the
Speaker:chakra system?Right,
Speaker:so I figured you would be and even though
Speaker:this wasn't specifically designed to do
Speaker:this, this this book that I wrote
Speaker:and let me see if I get the camera,
Speaker:this tattoo on the woman's
Speaker:back is designed
Speaker:to be the kundalini energy that
Speaker:rises from. That
Speaker:sacral region in the body, and as
Speaker:it does, then it connects
Speaker:to our spiritual self.
Speaker:So people who are
Speaker:really only in the
Speaker:spiritual area of thinking and
Speaker:they think that maybe sex doesn't matter.
Speaker:Or let's say if you're not in a place in
Speaker:your life where you're having active
Speaker:sex, we're going to talk about that as
Speaker:creative energy because it's the same
Speaker:thing. Creative energy and sexual energy
Speaker:are the same thing. So if you're not
Speaker:having sex, and especially if you're a
Speaker:man, what do you do with that? It it can
Speaker:become very frustrating and men can
Speaker:feel a lot of aggression because there's
Speaker:no outlet. And then trouble can start
Speaker:happening when there's no outlet, right?
Speaker:In all kinds of ways, when they
Speaker:can channel that though,
Speaker:into creative energy. And that could be
Speaker:through sports, it could be through.
Speaker:Music, it could be through a lot of
Speaker:different things, but
Speaker:especially moving the body,
Speaker:moving the body in the lower regions. And
Speaker:then let me say for women, moving
Speaker:the hips, because our hips are ball
Speaker:joints, they're intended to move and that
Speaker:creates health. When they don't move and
Speaker:they get stuck, we carry all kinds of
Speaker:stress in our hips. We need to get out
Speaker:and walk. We need to dance, get those
Speaker:hips moving and swaying right. And so
Speaker:you're able to. Channel some of that
Speaker:creative energy and you feel
Speaker:naturally better. And then that
Speaker:elevates your feeling of
Speaker:goodness about life, that life is good,
Speaker:you know, Otherwise that frustration sets
Speaker:in. So this is a really,
Speaker:really deep subject.
Speaker:And to write this book, I spent 10 years
Speaker:researching. I talked to ministers,
Speaker:therapists, couples.
Speaker:Strippers because this book is about the
Speaker:nature of God as seen through the eyes of
Speaker:an exotic dancer named You're Right
Speaker:named and I didn't know.
Speaker:Anything about that world. But I do know
Speaker:about the world of performance. So I
Speaker:thought I'm gonna have to do some
Speaker:research on this. So
Speaker:talking with exotic dancers and
Speaker:learning about their perspective
Speaker:on men and men who come into the
Speaker:club, it's like what is that about?
Speaker:What's that energetic exchange about?
Speaker:And what can women
Speaker:learn from that? Why men might be
Speaker:seeking that right. And so there are
Speaker:just. That that subject has so
Speaker:many spokes that we can't even begin to
Speaker:go into right now. But it's
Speaker:important. Yeah. So if we break
Speaker:it down into some sort of tangible steps,
Speaker:you've already mentioned movement.
Speaker:Particularly lower part of the body. But
Speaker:what, what are some steps that they can
Speaker:take if they feel that
Speaker:energy of well, if it shows up as
Speaker:frustration as you described, what what
Speaker:some steps taken, some tangible simple
Speaker:steps they can take to start channelling
Speaker:that energy in a, in a positive direction
Speaker:that will help them. Some way,
Speaker:yeah. So, you know, our our
Speaker:brains and our
Speaker:spine, our nervous system is an
Speaker:energetic Hwy OK. So there are
Speaker:impulses travelling all the time up
Speaker:and down the spine. And we can experience
Speaker:this. And there's
Speaker:some information from the Heart Math
Speaker:Institute as well that talks about how
Speaker:people don't realise that the heart.
Speaker:Generates more electrical energy in the
Speaker:body. Than the brain does and so the
Speaker:heart is informing the brain in the
Speaker:electrical system. So when you think
Speaker:about the fact that this isn't
Speaker:just that people can hear some of this
Speaker:and think wow, this is all this woo woo
Speaker:stuff. It's also science. So
Speaker:one of the things that we can do
Speaker:is going back to what we talked about
Speaker:earlier in meditation when we feel
Speaker:frustration. Then, and we may need
Speaker:to release energy for me.
Speaker:I'm going to go to music. I'm going to do
Speaker:what I call dancing it out. You can see
Speaker:my drum kit back here too. I'll get on my
Speaker:drums and yes, let go. OK, If I
Speaker:can't go skiing, then maybe I'll do
Speaker:that or go out on a walk
Speaker:and just channel that energy.
Speaker:I'm literally putting the energy
Speaker:into the earth and I'm connecting to the
Speaker:earth in a way where I feel
Speaker:grounded, I feel supported. And the
Speaker:Heart Math Institute talks about going
Speaker:out. And actually laying down on the
Speaker:grass because the Earth
Speaker:'s magnetic field comes up and
Speaker:it will wrap around us like a blanket
Speaker:and pull negative energy off of us.
Speaker:How beautiful is that? Yeah, it's
Speaker:awesome. This, the science of grounding
Speaker:is incredible. And, and for those who,
Speaker:like, want an example, they would
Speaker:understand is go to the beach. Walk with
Speaker:your shoes off along the edge of the
Speaker:water. And tell me you don't feel more
Speaker:relaxed and don't feel more grounded and,
Speaker:and sometimes you might even feel tired
Speaker:because it's the first time you've
Speaker:allowed yourself space to actually switch
Speaker:off. And again, those who like the
Speaker:science of things, if, if you do some
Speaker:research on very specific scientific
Speaker:data around particularly like use of the
Speaker:electromagnetic field of the, of the
Speaker:earth and ourselves, we can recharge.
Speaker:We're literally like a battery that can
Speaker:be recharged through that grounding
Speaker:process. That's what it is. And allowing
Speaker:yourself the time and space. I hear
Speaker:people, a phrase that I hear all the
Speaker:time, and unfortunately it's
Speaker:used in a way that sounds virtuous. It's
Speaker:not when you hear people saying, oh, I'm
Speaker:just so busy. I'm so busy. I'm so busy.
Speaker:And I'm like, that is a way of keeping
Speaker:yourself from grounding and
Speaker:from knowing who you are.
Speaker:What?Your real desires are, and the
Speaker:importance of knowing what your desires
Speaker:are is that it helps you
Speaker:understand. How you connect
Speaker:to other people because surface level
Speaker:desires, while we may think, oh, that's
Speaker:what I desire, if you keep asking
Speaker:yourself, why do you desire it? Why, why,
Speaker:why? If you keep going down
Speaker:to the grounding place of the real
Speaker:wine, it's so I can
Speaker:experience love, so I can be
Speaker:connected to other people. And
Speaker:so it's like, OK, Kim, how do you connect
Speaker:that to wanting a new Corvette?
Speaker:OK, well, why might I want a new
Speaker:Corvette? Well, because it makes me
Speaker:feel a certain way. How does it make you
Speaker:feel? Well, it makes me feel
Speaker:powerful. It makes me feel like I, I'm
Speaker:free 'cause I can go fast in it. And
Speaker:it makes me feel like I'm, I'm connected
Speaker:to it in a way that looks good and it,
Speaker:and it's, it's aesthetically pleasing
Speaker:and also all of the reasons
Speaker:why. And then you go, well, why do you
Speaker:want that? Why is that important?
Speaker:Well, because why do I want to be
Speaker:free? Well, because I
Speaker:feel chained up. Why do you feel I feel
Speaker:like I can't be myself? And so if you
Speaker:keep going down to those foundations,
Speaker:you come to the place where we
Speaker:all want
Speaker:to really be able to
Speaker:express who we
Speaker:actually are. And there can be
Speaker:so many layers, such big heavy
Speaker:blankets on top of that from.
Speaker:Upbringing from culture, whatever it is
Speaker:that says, oh, you're not that, you can't
Speaker:be that, that's not good, that's not
Speaker:right. Which is where that
Speaker:sexuality piece ties into it.
Speaker:Because when you express who you are and
Speaker:you feel freedom and you connect to other
Speaker:people, it's natural to feel that
Speaker:connective energy. And when we get
Speaker:with the dance of masculine and
Speaker:feminine energy and we want to connect
Speaker:with others of the opposite sex
Speaker:especially. And you know, without going
Speaker:into all the different. Forms
Speaker:and ways that masculine and feminine
Speaker:energy can take shape. Just for ease of
Speaker:this conversation, we'll say between men
Speaker:and women, between men who
Speaker:identify as masculine, women who identify
Speaker:as feminine. That exchange of energy is a
Speaker:dance. And in order to really
Speaker:be able to give ourselves to the
Speaker:dance, we have to feel free. And
Speaker:in order to feel free, we have to do
Speaker:the work of uncovering. Who we
Speaker:are. So if I don't know who I
Speaker:am, how can I freely
Speaker:give to my partner? How
Speaker:can I freely say I I am
Speaker:open to receive who
Speaker:you are and care for you
Speaker:completely and vice versa?
Speaker:So good. What I learned around
Speaker:the the busyness trap is
Speaker:exactly what you were describing there.
Speaker:It's it's not a question of being busy,
Speaker:It's actually a question of priorities.
Speaker:And when you say you're too busy for XYZ,
Speaker:what you're saying is they're not a
Speaker:priority. And when you look at it like
Speaker:that, you go, well, actually, yeah, of
Speaker:course, those things are a priority. And
Speaker:so it's like, well, maybe there's some
Speaker:things that need to change. You need to
Speaker:actually make some time and space for
Speaker:those priorities. And one of the key
Speaker:things that you mentioned there is to get
Speaker:in touch with who you are, like so many
Speaker:of us have lost touch with.
Speaker:Well, who is who? Who are we at our
Speaker:essence? So I honour you
Speaker:forcoming on and sharing. You at your
Speaker:essence and and for allowing us to go
Speaker:into some of those. Intuitive rabbit
Speaker:holes to the hope that it will open
Speaker:up some some thoughts for people to think
Speaker:about who they are beyond that surface
Speaker:level and who maybe they.
Speaker:Yeah, could be
Speaker:become in the future.
Speaker:So. Just to wrap
Speaker:this up, Kim.
Speaker:We've talked about a number of different
Speaker:topics in terms of
Speaker:creating more of what
Speaker:you like, what the listener or the viewer
Speaker:wants in their life. What's
Speaker:some whether it be through? Well,
Speaker:I asked through this lens. For me,
Speaker:looking back over my journey of personal
Speaker:growth, I realised I actually learnt a
Speaker:lot of these lessons the first time in
Speaker:sport.
Speaker:How can you what What's some advice you
Speaker:can give to the people listening of
Speaker:how they can identify some of those key
Speaker:lessons that they've experienced so
Speaker:that they can use those experiences to
Speaker:help them in the future?
Speaker:Good question. I
Speaker:think that, you know, I just keep going
Speaker:back to meditation.
Speaker:Meditation is this place
Speaker:where you allow yourself
Speaker:to.
Speaker:Experience what
Speaker:I've heard called and and I've
Speaker:experienced this myself, the witness.
Speaker:The witness, is this
Speaker:true? You, this place inside of you?
Speaker:Where this Kim and
Speaker:Ian, these personas
Speaker:that we see here?
Speaker:Do not encompass the whole of our
Speaker:souls and everything that we are. And as
Speaker:we pass energetically into the
Speaker:next life and shed these bodies,
Speaker:what is that? Who is that what? What is
Speaker:that soul? What is that spirit?
Speaker:So being able to.
Speaker:Know and see that that is
Speaker:who you truly are, that
Speaker:timeless being, that timeless
Speaker:energy that has.
Speaker:A let's call it an energetic pattern, a
Speaker:frequency to it because it's not a
Speaker:personality, but
Speaker:it is an energy that a
Speaker:signature that is you,
Speaker:my signature, my energy signature is
Speaker:different from yours, right?So it's a
Speaker:different frequency and
Speaker:knowing what that is, and it doesn't have
Speaker:to get into an intellectual
Speaker:knowing. It's it's
Speaker:simply understanding that
Speaker:you're walking in this world
Speaker:in a persona and in meditation.
Speaker:If you can get into that quiet space for
Speaker:just a few minutes, then
Speaker:you say who?Who is doing the
Speaker:meditating? Who is having this
Speaker:experience? Who is sitting here?On the
Speaker:couch right now. It's
Speaker:more than the persona. So if you
Speaker:can get into those spaces for just a few
Speaker:minutes, you will start to
Speaker:see and feel and
Speaker:remember the goodness in your
Speaker:life. That is a thread that runs
Speaker:through your whole life. No matter
Speaker:what kind of trauma you may have
Speaker:been through. There's this
Speaker:river of peace. And
Speaker:calm and goodness and love that's
Speaker:just always there. That trauma is
Speaker:something that's happened to
Speaker:us in this physical world. And yes, it
Speaker:can affect our psyches greatly and change
Speaker:who we are as people and the way we show
Speaker:up in the world. And yet
Speaker:there's this river that runs deep, deep,
Speaker:deep that is full of
Speaker:joy and full of knowing that
Speaker:we're connected to all that is and that
Speaker:all. As well. So I would
Speaker:say if you can spend those quiet moments
Speaker:and if you have to start by reflecting
Speaker:on. What is a
Speaker:time that I felt
Speaker:most like myself? What
Speaker:is a time where I feel
Speaker:today the most connected
Speaker:to my true self? And maybe nobody knows
Speaker:that person yet? Where do I feel
Speaker:the most connected? Where do I feel the
Speaker:most free? I wish I could be like that
Speaker:every day. Keep
Speaker:asking yourself, where do I feel the
Speaker:most free? And maybe it says, you know,
Speaker:that time when I was in that cricket game
Speaker:and I scored and it
Speaker:was like I just left my body and I
Speaker:was bigger than the whole game and I
Speaker:was connected to everyone in the crowd.
Speaker:Oh, who is that? OK, where
Speaker:has that? Where has that energy
Speaker:shown up before?Oh, remember
Speaker:when my daughter was born?And I
Speaker:felt like, wow, look at this, this is so
Speaker:much bigger than I am as an individual.
Speaker:And you'll start seeing these markers. So
Speaker:I would just say continue to tap into
Speaker:those high points that you've
Speaker:experienced in life and you'll start to
Speaker:see a thread there. And then that
Speaker:thread can start connecting you deeper
Speaker:to who you are. And keep using
Speaker:meditation and if you want to.
Speaker:Tap into further some of the tools and
Speaker:things that I have.
Speaker:Go. kimberly
Speaker:kane. com I've got
Speaker:links there for all kinds of things, all
Speaker:kinds of free stuff, but also those
Speaker:movement meditations that can help you get
Speaker:centred and you'll find that place.
Speaker:You will find it awesome.
Speaker:So good, we'll make sure we get those
Speaker:links in the show notes if anyone wants
Speaker:to check that out.
Speaker:It's a great answer. It's meditations had
Speaker:such a profound impact for me and
Speaker:I'd never thought about it like that from
Speaker:that perspective. But you're right, it it
Speaker:helps you connect to to who you are
Speaker:because of you come back to more
Speaker:of that, that calm, that focus
Speaker:and connect that thread. I talk about a
Speaker:thread as well from a bit of a different
Speaker:perspective, but it's true. It's like we
Speaker:have we have these key markers that
Speaker:they are essentially who we are. I talk
Speaker:through more from a business perspective
Speaker:of like. You're looking for what you
Speaker:should be doing in your business, what
Speaker:your personal brand is. It's that thread.
Speaker:It's exactly what you talked about that
Speaker:so thread of markers of of the
Speaker:great moments when was just so effortless
Speaker:and and it connected you something bigger
Speaker:than yourself. That's we for that
Speaker:purpose. That's. Yeah, profound. Thank
Speaker:you so much for sharing that, Kim. Thank
Speaker:you so much for sharing your wisdom and
Speaker:your stories. Some real goal there and I
Speaker:appreciate it. This has been so great.
Speaker:It's been so fun connecting with you, I
Speaker:got to say. You know, like I said, we
Speaker:need more strong
Speaker:masculine leaders and anytime that
Speaker:I get an opportunity to connect with one
Speaker:of those souls, I'm like, keep
Speaker:going. Thank you for being in the world.
Speaker:Keep doing what you do. I appreciate you.
Speaker:Thanks, Kim. I appreciate you too. You're
Speaker:welcome.
Speaker:Make sure you jump on to Kim's site and
Speaker:check out her free resources. Her link is
Speaker:in the show notes. Some of that stuff on
Speaker:intuition. I know everyone's experienced
Speaker:it and you've had those moments where
Speaker:you've really felt other people's energy
Speaker:before they've even spoken. Whatever
Speaker:doesn't resonate, leave it behind. But if
Speaker:you can have an open mind, you'll get a
Speaker:heap out of that, including what we can
Speaker:learn from our animal friends as well.
Speaker:Meditation is a big part of what I talk
Speaker:about, as you know. Kim had some great
Speaker:tips there. I love how she talked about
Speaker:the simplicity of things. And if you're
Speaker:looking for more simplicity and
Speaker:you've already done a bit of meditation
Speaker:and you're looking to take that to
Speaker:another level, I'll make sure I drop the
Speaker:link in there for my performance
Speaker:meditation. I'll put the
Speaker:coupon in there. So you get, I think it
Speaker:comes up at $11.00. So absolute
Speaker:bargain just for listening to today's
Speaker:episode. And yeah, you can
Speaker:connect deeper with yourself a lot of
Speaker:what Kim was talking about today and
Speaker:build more of that strength from the
Speaker:inside out.
Speaker:You've taken the time to listen to this
Speaker:whole episode. Now it's time to take
Speaker:action. Commit to one thing you've
Speaker:learned today and make it happen. And to
Speaker:avoid any obstructions, join the Sporty's
Speaker:Life movement by clicking on the link in
Speaker:the show notes.
